Girl Talk

If you don't have an eighth grade daughter in our school, I thought some of you would like to see how things are approached here at Bios. Mrs. Greene, among the many hats she wears here at Bios, is are Beyond Bios College Counselor. The other women are 7-12 teachers here.

To:  Parents of 8th Grade Girls

Dear Parents,

Early in the week it was brought to my attention that there have been some issues with the 8th grade girls.  I spoke with Mr. Ihms and he said that I could meet with the girls after their Bible quiz to encourage them to honor God with their words and to show kindness (see my talk below).  Mrs. Ihms, Mrs. Dominguez, and Mrs. Cylwik were with me for the talk to add anything to what I shared and answer any questions.  More than once I encouraged the girls to speak with their parents if they are struggling with any issues because you love them more than anyone - but told them that if they needed anything from us, that we would be happy to pray with them, encourage them, and help where we can.  At the end of my talk, before praying for the class of 2017, I gave them each a scripture card - you can ask your daughter what verse from Titus I selected.

If you have any questions or concerns, please let me know and I would be happy to meet with you.  The girls really did not share anything at the meeting but were quiet listeners.

It is my honor to work at a school that supports parents in the training of their children in godliness.

Blessings,

Lori Greene

lgreene@bioschristianacademy.org

Here is what I shared with the girls if you would like to talk with them about it this weekend:

“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control.” Galatians 5:22-23

Without saying a name, think of someone who you would consider a nice girl.  What is it about her that makes you think she is nice? 

Again, without saying a name, think of someone you would consider a not-so-nice girl.  What is it about her that makes you think she isn’t-so-nice?

We all have our moments when we aren’t so nice.  We say something we shouldn’t, roll our eyes, are quick to get angry, maybe even gossip, or have feelings of envy.  Hopefully they are only short or temporary moments that don’t define us.  Instead, what we want to define us is the fruit of the spirit.  If someone were to describe us, as Christians we want them to say we are loving to others, show the joy of Jesus, are peace makers, show patience with everyone, are kind, have good things to say, are faithful to keep our promises, are gentle in our responses, and have self-control in areas like our speech, boys, and modesty.

I think some of the biggest areas where girls struggle with how to treat each other have to do with boys, gossip, cliques, jealousy, and the desire to be liked/accepted/friended.

First, the issue of boys.  Please don’t let boys get in the way of how you treat others.  You shouldn’t need to act differently or change your friends for the sake of a boy.  This is a good time to make friends with boys and leave it at that. 

Gossip:  Do not say something to one person that you would not want repeated.  It will get repeated.  Even if it is not repeated in a bad way or with bad intentions, it will be repeated. 

There is nothing good about gossip.  The only parts of us that feel better when we do it are the really selfish, insecure parts.  Gossip brings girls together – in a really yucky way – like when they gang up on the poor girl they are ripping to shreds with their words.

Memorize  Ephesians 4:29 “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.”  Learn this now and you will avoid much heartache in your future.

Cliques.  You are the class of 2017 and will be together for the next 5 years.  It is ok to have friends who you are closer with than others.  But, examine your heart and/or motives.  Are you trying to be exclusive with someone and trying to keep others out?  Or are you friendly, loving, and kind to others?  Love your neighbors as yourself. 

Jealousy:  Girls have a hard time being glad for each other when good things happen, mostly because we want those good things for ourselves.  Pray for God to change your heart to make you more generous than jealous.

Friends:  The best way to make a friend is to be a friend.  Think about what you want in a friend, then act that way.  The best kinds of friends are those who are loyal, who will stand up for you no matter the cost, and who are kind to you.  Good friends encourage you and tell you when you do something well.  They gently challenge you when you do something that’s not true to who you are or what you believe.  They bring out the best in you.  They make you want to be a better person just by the way they treat you.